Pulp Fiction’s dialogue is punchy and poetic, obscene yet somehow mystic. It is perhaps, the best screenplay ever written. In no particular order:
1) Jules: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa… stop right there. Eatin’ a bitch out, and givin’ a bitch a foot massage ain’t even the same fuckin’ thing. order…
Vincent: It’s not. It’s the same ballpark.
Jules: Ain’t no fuckin’ ballpark neither. Now look, maybe your method of massage differs from mine, but, you know, touchin’ his wife’s feet, and stickin’ your tongue in her Holiest of Holies, ain’t the same fuckin’ ballpark, it ain’t the same league, it ain’t even the same fuckin’ sport. Look, foot massages don’t mean shit.
Vincent: Have you ever given a foot massage?
Jules: [scoffs] Don’t be tellin’ me about foot massages. I’m the foot fuckin’ master.
2) Yolanda: [about to rob a diner] I love you, Pumpkin.
Pumpkin: I love you, Honey Bunny. [Standing up with a gun] All right, everybody be cool, this is a robbery!
Yolanda: Any of you fucking pricks move, and I’ll execute every motherfucking last one of ya!
3) Pumpkin: The way it is now, you’re taking the same risk as when you rob a bank. You take more of a risk, banks are easier. You don’t even need a gun in a federal bank. I mean, they’re insured, why should they give a fuck? I heard of this one guy, walks into a bank with a portable phone. He gives the phone to the teller, a guy on the other end of the line says, we’ve got this guy’s little girl, if you don’t give him all your money, we’re gonna kill her.
Yolanda: Did it work?
Pumpkin: Fucking-A right, it worked. That’s what I’m saying. Knucklehead walks into a bank with a telephone! Not a pistol, not a shotgun, but a fucking phone. Cleans the place out, doesn’t even lift a fucking finger.
Yolanda:Did they hurt the little girl?
Pumpkin: I don’t know, there probably never was a little girl in the first place. The point of the story isn’t the little girl, the point of the story is, they robbed a bank with a telephone.
4) Yolanda: Garçon! Coffee!
[the waitress approaches the table and refills Pumpkin’s cup]
Waitress: ‘Garçon’ means boy.
5) Vincent: Want some bacon?
Jules: No man, I don’t eat pork.
Vincent: Are you Jewish?
Jules: Nah, I ain’t Jewish, I just don’t dig on swine, that’s all.
Vincent: Why not?
Jules: Pigs are filthy animals. I don’t eat filthy animals.
Vincent: Bacon tastes gooood. Pork chops taste gooood.
Jules: Hey, sewer rat may taste like pumpkin pie, but I’d never know ’cause I wouldn’t eat the filthy motherfucker. Pigs sleep and root in shit. That’s a filthy animal. I ain’t eat nothin’ that ain’t got sense enough to disregard its own feces.
Vincent: How about a dog? Dogs eats its own feces.
Jules: I don’t eat dog either.
Vincent: Yeah, but do you consider a dog to be a filthy animal?
Jules: I wouldn’t go so far as to call a dog filthy but they’re definitely dirty. But, a dog’s got personality. Personality goes a long way.
Vincent: Ah, so by that rationale, if a pig had a better personality, he would cease to be a filthy animal. Is that true?
Jules: Well we’d have to be talkin’ about one charming motherfuckin’ pig. I mean he’d have to be ten times more charmin’ than that Arnold on Green Acres, you know what I’m sayin’?
6) Vincent: [to Marvin] Why the fuck didn’t you tell us somebody was in the bathroom? Slipped your mind? Did you forget that somebody was in there with a goddamn hand cannon?
7) Vincent: That’s a pretty fucking good milkshake. I don’t know if it’s worth five dollars but it’s pretty fucking good.
8) Jules: The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy My brothers. And you will know My name is the Lord when I lay My vengeance upon thee.
9) Lance: You’re going to give her an injection of adrenaline directly to her heart. But she’s got, uh, breastplate…
[taps Mia’s chest]
Lance: So you gotta pierce through that. So what you have to do is, you have to bring the needle down in a stabbing motion.
Vincent: I-I gotta stab her three times?
Lance: No, you don’t gotta fucking stab her three times! You gotta stab her once, but it’s gotta be hard enough to break through her breastplate into her heart, and then once you do that, you press down on the plunger.
Vincent: What happens after that?
Lance: I’m kinda curious about that myself…
10) Butch: I think I cracked a rib.
Fabienne: Giving me oral pleasure?
Butch: No, retard, from the fight.