Evilution (2008)

0.5 STARS

General Information

The information below is taken from the following link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1262416/

18        Horror

DirectorChris ConleeWritors

Brian Patrick O’Toole

Stars

Eric Peter-Kaiser; Sandra Ramírez; Tim Colceri  

Plot:

An alien bacteria has the power to raise the dead to life again, the bacterium manages to get into the body of somebody living in a suburban apartment, and as the day progresses, the amount of zombies increases and increases…

Review:

I was flicking through channels on my sky plus box in an attempt to find a downright apocalyptic, depressing, gory, nightmarish zombie film which could be compared to 28 Days Later, but isn’t actually 28 Days Later. (As you do). Anyway, I came across the horror channel and found Evilution, the summary described it as an ‘apocalyptic horror’ with lots of gore and violence. So hey, I recorded. It sounded quite good, and I watched it with a friend of mine a week later.

Now, I must point out, I like to watch a film with an open-mind, I can suspend my disbelief higher than most people can.

The plot begins around about twenty minutes in, the character ‘Darren’ injects a gangster named ‘random’ with the bacterial serum God knows why, but hey, it’s probably a pathetic, not very well thought out plot device which the writer’s put in because they wanted to go out for a cup of coffee down their local cafe…I imagine. (I later find out that he did this to somehow make Random feel better, because Random had just been shot by a couple of gangsters).

Now, obviously, once this happens, Random turns into zombie, the process is slow, at first, he begins to convulse and shake, almost like he is having a fit.

Now, whilst this is happening, Darren pops around to Mandy’s room. Mandy is the eye-candy of the film, and that is her only purpose. (The director is perverted). Mandy and Darren then have brief passionate sex, for no real reason – and then later on in the film, Darren wants to save her. (As if you’d develop emotions with your one-night-stand. Pah-lease!)

Now, whilst Darren is pleasuring Mandy, Random’s symptoms gets worse and worse and he escapes. So in simple terms, Darren had sex with Mandy as a plot device so that Random could run around the apartment, bite someone and then allow the zombie-count to build. Simple as that.

Evilution is a genuinely dispacable pile of garbage spewed out of cinema’s backside, it is whimpering, cowering attempt at a horror film, I wasn’t frightened by it, I laughed at it.

Now, the characters are equally ridiculous, we have somne gangsters who just stay stuff like ‘yeah blad, innit’, an army officer who shouts all the time, and a science geek who is just well…geeky. Obviously, as in most zombie films, these characters must unite as a team to defend themselves from the zombies. In the case of Evilution, shouty-screamy-ex-army-officer just well…shouts and screams. Hey, that’s ‘acting’ for you.

Other ridiculous things occur in this film. There’s a hallway sequence where a big muscular bodybuilder and a young woman step out of the room wondering what all of the fuss is about. Then (surprise, surprise) zombies turn up; the bodybuilder man says ‘bring it!’ The girl, is wearing a towel…and because this film is so low and unwitty and misogynistic (*see random sex scene between Mandy and Darren) a random zombie rips the towel off her soso that she’s completely naked.

As I draw nearer to the conclusion of this review, I must reveal my main point: a good horror relies on atmosphere and its characters. Evilution lacked any atmosphere, in fact, there was none. It’s characters were simple stock characters, the scientist was just a nerd, the army character shouted all the time (so much so that he pulled quite hilarious facial expressions. I found this rather good. So much so, I rewound and played certain bits over and over again. For my own entertainment…I need to go out more).

Don’t waste your time with this.

Verdict:

A poor zombie film in every sense: laughable rather than scary, un-atmospheric rather than atmospheric, and characters I couldn’t care about rather than characters I could care about.

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